Forever, But Not Always

When you are the Mistress to The Military...Balancing Marriage and the Call of Duty.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 29 Apr 2024 14:38:00 +0000

I'm so lucky to have access to interesting people. Life would be so boring if everyone was like me...thankfully that is not the case.

I sat down with two of my very best friends, who also happen to be my literal next-door neighbors. We met and essentially fell in love during COVID when we moved in next door and the rest is history.

Bryson is an Airfield Manager in the Military and Jackie is a teacher and pretty much the CEO of the Barnette household. We sat down to talk about navigating marriage when the Military is priority one in the relationship. These two have found a consistent balance within the chaos and are candid about the difficulties they have experienced living within a military marriage.

Enjoy!

You can see their engagement story in Glamour Magzine here: https://www.glamour.com/story/the-first-night-home-from-the-3

Get my Marry Me Smart Course, currently $100 off, by clicking this link!

https://marrymesmart.thrivecart.com/marry-me-smart-limited-time-only/

Follow me on Instagram @chelseapaganesq

Follow my on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marrymesmart/

Join My Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marrymesmart

My Marry Me Smart Course for Premarital Planning Launches this month so make sure you are following me on all platforms to learn more.

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Forever, But Not Always is a huge advocate of therapy both for individuals and couples. Online-Therapy.com offers, Individual and couples therapy, Weekly 45-minute live sessions (video, voice or text), Unlimited messaging, 8 8-section CBT program, incl. 25 worksheets, Daily worksheet replies Mon-Fri, Yoga & meditation-videos, journal, activity plan & tests, Change therapists with a click of a button, Therapy on a secure & confidential platform, Their Premium plan includes two weekly live sessions + express replies.

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How Marriages are like Business Partnerships-Chats with my Work Wife.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 15 Apr 2024 14:00:00 +0000

For me, choosing a business partner was a very important decision. I needed to know that I could trust this person with my personal financial information and trust that they were going to be as committed to building a thriving business as I was. Being friends with the person would be a bonus, but not required.

However, I got very lucky in business. My business partner, Emily Hepner, not only is one of my favorite people but the trust and respect I have for her as a business owner continues to grow each year we work together.

We approached the building of our business very similarly to how we encourage our clients to approach premarital planning. We had a plan, we had hard conversations, and then we put it into a legally binding agreement.

In this episode, we talk about our relationship dynamics and how it helps us operate our business each day. Our relationship is stronger because of the work we did before we decided to hang our shingle.

Enjoy!

Get my Marry Me Smart Course, currently $100 off, by clicking this link!

https://marrymesmart.thrivecart.com/marry-me-smart-limited-time-only/

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Follow my on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marrymesmart/

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Get your Savings Goals in Check With Chelsea Pagan

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 08 Apr 2024 14:00:00 +0000

Hey Hey Friends, it's me. Just me Chelsea Pagan.

Today I want to talk about Savings and investment discussions to have with your partner before you say I do.

This conversation is highlighted in my Marry Me Smart Course and is an important topic to address so you and your parent can build a partnership together that both parties are working towards.

When financial goals are not aligned, resentment can build. Resentment leads to anger. Anger leads to miscommunication and distance in a relationship. These types of patterns is what kills marriages.

So talk to your partner about your savings, investment, and retirement goals before you get married so no one is blindsided. Talk to a lawyer about your legal options for ensuring that your agreements are legally binding.

Get my Marry Me Smart Course, currently $100 off, by clicking this link!

https://marrymesmart.thrivecart.com/marry-me-smart-limited-time-only/

Follow me on Instagram @chelseapaganesq

Follow my on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marrymesmart/

Join My Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marrymesmart

My Marry Me Smart Course for Premarital Planning Launches this month so make sure you are following me on all platforms to learn more.

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He's Back! Talking finances with Nick Pagan.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 25 Mar 2024 14:00:00 +0000

Hey Hey Friends.

So I love having experts on to talk all things money, marriage, and relationships, is so much fun. I learn something new every episode and have a blast hanging with people I get to call my friends.

But there is nothing quite like chatting it up with my Husband about how I apply my advice, strategies and tips for marriage in real life.

And hey, we have a lot to work on ourselves, but when it comes to money, we are always on the same page because we have a plan and we coordinate and stick to it.

We share a little about our dynamic when it comes to how we handle finances including the topic of our relationship with money which takes me back to episode 4 of this season. Make sure to subscribe to this podcast wherever you are listening so you never miss an update.

Follow me on Instagram @chelseapaganesq

Follow my on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marrymesmart/

Join My Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marrymesmart

My Marry Me Smart Course for Premarital Planning Launches this month so make sure you are following me on all platforms to learn more.

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Get 20% off your first month by following the link below!

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Estate Planning Is About So Much More Than What Happens After you Die.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 11 Mar 2024 14:00:00 +0000

I say this a lot, the two most legally significant things you can do in life are get married and die. So I decided that during a season where Money is the highlight, teaching you how to keep as much of that money with your estate in the event of your Death was an important topic to cover.

My friend, Janelle Hansen, an Estate Planning Attorney in Northern California, joins me to help highlight some of the benefits of an estate plan. These benefits go beyond what happens in death. She highlights the benefits of an estate plan whether you are a single individual or if you have a spouse or family.

As a family law attorney, I rely on my experienced colleagues to brainstorm ideas for my clients that ensure they are set up for success both in life, in the event of divorce, and in the event of death.

You can find Janelle at: https://jhtrustlaw.com/

LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/janelle-hansen-a0876652/

Don't forget to follow @foreverbutnotpod and @chelseapaganesq on instagram.

Looking to learn more about all things premarital planning and connect with other individuals navigating what it means to be married, Join My Facebook Group: Marry Me Smary--Premarital Planning & Coaching. CLICK HERE TO JOIN.

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Why Your Relationship with Money Matters.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 04 Mar 2024 14:00:00 +0000

I love to talk about Money. It's not taboo, it's sexy. It's empowering.

Billy Zerillo and I met on Instagram sharing our love for talking about money and how it can be used as a tool to build stronger relationships.

Billy is a financial advisor whose passion is helping women (especially women who have experienced divorce) answer tough financial questions and gain their purpose back.

Billy and I talk about why individuals need to acknowledge their relationship with money, including reflecting on where they first learned about the value and importance of money--thinking back to your childhood and what experiences first shaped the way you spend and save now. We also talk about how views on money can change over time, especially as your priorities change in life.

This is part 1 of our conversation. We finish Part 2 on Billy's Podcast The Money Talk. We shift the conversation to why it is important to share your relationship with money with your significant other and how each person's unique experience with money can impact a marriage.

Link to Billy's Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@Themoneytalkpod/streams

Where to find Billy:

https://www.terrawealth.com/billy-zerillo/

Instagram: @themoneytalkadvisor

Remember to follow @foreverbutnotpod and @chelseapaganesq on Instagram.

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TRIGGER WARNING: The Impact of Domestic Violence on Your Family Court Case

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 26 Feb 2024 14:00:00 +0000

We are talking about some heavy stuff today with Family Law Attorney Nicole Ford.

1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men experience severe intimate partner physical violence, intimate partner contact sexual violence, and/or intimate partner stalking with impacts such as injury, fearfulness, post-traumatic stress disorder, use of victim services, contraction of sexually transmitted diseases, etc.(Bureau of Justices Statistics).

I want to make sure everyone knows that the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7, you can call 800-799-7233 or text Start to 88788 now.

While I have limited the number of Dometic Violence cases I take on professionally due to the significant emotional toll it was taking on me, Nicole Ford tackles these cases every day, advocating for clients who might need a voice to share their stories. With nearly 20 years of experience working in Family Law, Nicole works tirelessly, and often thanklessly in a field that can sometimes take more than it gives.

We address a small snap shot of the domestic violence issues we encounter in family court, including talking about the difference between Family Law Restraining Orders and Criminal Restraining Orders.

You can contact Nicole at: Nicoleford24@gmail.coom

You can visit her campaign site at: https://nicolefordforjudge.com/

The National Domestic Violence Hotline Contact Information: 800-799-7233

Text Start to 88788

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Let's Talk About Money Baby!

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Tue, 20 Feb 2024 14:00:00 +0000

I love talking about money and ways money can help us have the happiest lives, and it has nothing to do with having a lot of it or more than the next guy.

It has to do with your views on money and what your goals are.

On Today’s episode, I invited my friend Cherie Austin to talk about money freedom and how both individuals and couples can develop their own personalized money strategies to build the life they want.

Cherie has worked in the finance world for nearly 15 years and has a wide range of experience dealing with numerous wealth and financial strategies.

Her coaching business, Where Money Meets Manifesting addresses both the emotional/energetic AND the practical sides of money. Her clients learn how to make empowered money decisions with unshakeable confidence and ease, and are finally able to arrive at the place Where Money Meets Manifesting.

Her passion for money and helping people find financial freedom is so refreshing and fun.

You can find her on Instagram @wheremoneymeetsmanifesting

Where she includes a link to work with her as well as additional resources.

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If You Don't See My Worth, I'm Not Going To Explain It To You.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 12 Feb 2024 05:00:00 +0000

I can't tell you how often people ask for discounts or balk at the idea of paying for a consultation with me.

Not everyone can afford my services, I get it and understand. Sometimes, I might even lose clients because of it, but that is ok.

On this episode, I wanted to explore the idea that knowing your value, including knowing and standing behind your rate, takes more than just self-awareness. It takes research, and understanding the market, but also an acknowledgment that you might lose a client or two who doesn't think you are worth what you are asking for.

And I get to do it with long-time friend and successful entrepreneur, Jaime Garland. Hair Stylist, Color, Educator, and badass business owner. Her Salon Bsociety is located in Los Gatos, CA.

Jamie has created such a high demand for her services, that she is not currently able to take on new clients. She nurtures and respects every dollar and hour her clients spend in her chair. She knows her worth but knows that giving clients what they need versus what she might be able to charge the most for is not only best for the client, but best for her brand.

We had a blast chatting about business and money. I know you are going to enjoy her vibe and energy as much as I do!

You can find her on instagram @jamiegarlandhair

Got follow her now so you don't miss all the amazing things she has coming up.

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Document Your Sexy!

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 22 Jan 2024 14:00:00 +0000

The relationship you have with yourself and your body can impact so many aspects of your life. From intimate relationships to your friendships and overall physical and mental health.

Becky Fryer is an amazing photographer who specializes in female boudoir photos in the bay area! I have had the pleasure of having her document many aspects of my life from my engagement photos and wedding to my personal boudoir photos last year. Becky and I chat about how powerful the boudoir experience can be not only because you document this amazing chapter of your life, wherever you are at the moment, but the real-time experience of being behind a camera where the focus is on nothing but you...and you being SEXY!

Becky's recommendation is to approach these photos for yourself. They should be for you first before they become a spicy little gift for your partner. I always have so much fun with Becky and you will too!

You'll here us drop a bunch of names you might not know including family and friends. You can tell we were having so much fun catching up and reminiscing.

Follow Becky at @Boudoirbybecky on Instagram

Check out her website: https://www.boudoirbybecky.com/

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Get 20% off your first month by following the link below!

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Get Your Love Game in Check

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 15 Jan 2024 14:00:00 +0000

Leah Mitchell helps unapologetically successful women also be shamelessly loved by a heartful masculine leader. After having disappointing experiences in love herself, she took the lessons she learned, the tools she gained, and turned that journey into a successful business helping other women attract the partner they want.

She leans in hard to the science of attraction while acknowledging that love is not rational at times. Her unique perspective on match matching and dating is something you will want to hear. No matter where you are in your love journey, there are tools Leah shares that can be used in everyday life and applied to friendships or even business relationships. We could have chatted for hours! (We kept chatting even after recording because we just connected!).

Find all of Leah's Links here: https://msha.ke/leahcoaching?fbclid=IwAR0Gbg_0USHj5LKBtyTz4rFJFNI6rjDPN-FpSs5EctiOGX1x4S0Ako63oZw

Don't forget to follow @foreverbutnotpod on Instagram as well as @chelseapaganesq for updates from me, your premarital planning bestie!

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Get 20% your first month by following the link below!

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The Lessons of 7 Marriages

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 08 Jan 2024 14:00:00 +0000

Hey Hey Friends. Happy New Year! We have a few more epsiodes in season one and Im so thankful to be back behind the mic for a bit. For this espidoe, set aside a bit more time, it will be worth it.

Set aside some time for this longer-than-usual episode. It is worth it.

Life is short and marriages can be too. JoAnn Fawcett just ended marriage number 7 and has lots of stories to share. There are so many life lessons JoAnn shares with us, not only when it to comes to marriage, but when it comes to personal growth. She is candid about the things that did not work out and speaks with such lightness. There are some dark moments, funny moments, and overall fascinating stories that kept me wanting more.

JoAnn is now a speaker and author and overall pretty cool lady.

Stick around for the details of marriage number 7...it is the longest of JoAnn's marriages and also the most....interesting.

Where to find JoAnn Fawcett:

www.dragonhillbooks.net
www.joannfawcett.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jo.a.richards.5
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jo-ann-fawcett-a7b9b832/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jo.ann.fawcett.author/

emails:
info@joannfawcett.com
joann@joannfawcett.com

Don't forget to follow @foreverbutnotpod and @chelseapaganesq on instagram!

When Life Throws Volleyballs At Your Face, Learn to Block Them!

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 11 Dec 2023 14:00:00 +0000

It's hard to explain the connection you have with teammates, especially college teammates you spend years of your life with working together toward a common goal. Emily and I will always be connected, even when our busy lives keep us from connecting as much as we both would like. In this episode, we talk about our former athlete years, how it has impacted us as adults, and the adjustments we have to make as we get older when it comes to our health. Emily shares her health journey with us and discusses how learning she has Hashimoto's has changed the way she takes care of herself. This episode has so many relateable topics, not just for former athletes, but for busy moms, working parents, and those struggling to figure out how to be on top of their health.

Emily candidly shares her health journey. While listening it is important to remember that Emily and I are not medical professionals, but are sharing our insights into our own experiences with health. The message really is consult your doctor, do research, ask questions, and get to know what your body needs.

Enjoy.

Are you Bored? Or Are you Boring?

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 04 Dec 2023 14:00:00 +0000

Navi Bliss is a certified love and relationship coach who brings her unique life experiences into her business to empower those looking for something more out of life. She teaches her clients her 4 pillars of confidence, how to get their sexy back and live a life full of passion and value. She is also an author, speaker, podcaster, and so much more. We talked about her journey to living a Blissful life and tools you can use now to find your confidence!

Check out her website: https://www.naviblisscoaching.com/

Resources Navi Recommends:

Authors: Louise Hay and Michael Singer (quoted as Michael Smith during our convo).

Keep an eye out for her book coming out in next year! Broken to Blissful.

Listen, Understand, and Validate What Your Body and Mind is Telling You.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 27 Nov 2023 14:00:00 +0000

Taking time for yourself does not always have to look like a spa day, a shopping trip, or even a vacation. Sometimes taking time for yourself is just taking a moment or two to breathe and shut out the noise. Prioritizing mental health is more important now than ever and finding the tools that you need to be the best version of you is critical.

Michelle Pettengill, is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker aka Mental Health Therapist! She focuses her work on supporting adult individuals with nutrition for mental health, and self-care for daily anxieties/stressors, in addition to providing couples with a wellness check-up! During the pandemic, she really fine-tuned her private practice to focus on the things we tend to let go of when there is chaos, nutrition and self-care. She has so many tools to offer her clients and her calming nature when she speaks is addicting. I learned so much and had a blast. Enjoy.

Michelle's Recommendations:

For Anxiety my #1 book is: Rewire the Anxious Brain by Pittman & Carle

For Self Care: Self Love Workbook for Woman by Megan Logan, LCSW

For Wellness for Marriage: Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson

Cooking for Hormones: Magdalena Wszelaki, Nan McNamara, et al.

Michelle's Website: https://www.michellepettengilllcsw.com/

It’s not my business what you think of me.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 20 Nov 2023 14:00:00 +0000

The theme of this episode really landed on just being true to yourself, doing what makes you happy, and saying “eff it” to fear of making big life changes. Kendall Robowski left her career as a teacher to build an interior design business that would allow her more flexibility to spend time with her family, but also to focus on her individual goals. During the pandemic, she committed to move her body more and now she is competing with top athletes regularly. She doesn’t concern herself with the opinions others have of her, surrounds herself with a crew of doers and will continue to prioritize herself and her goals so she can be the best version of herself for her family.

I can’t wait to see what 2024 Kendall has to show the world. I'm here for it. (Note, I had trouble cutting this episode down because I just loved every little bit of it.).

Follow Kendall on Instagram at kendallrobowski and at harperwilliamdesigns.

What does saying "I Do" really means--legally.

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 13 Nov 2023 14:00:00 +0000

Hey Hey Friends.

Getting married is often the result of falling in love, but getting married is actually a legally binding decision that can have all sorts of consequences and benefits that you may not even understand. Would you enter a business relationship without a contract? Then why are so many people entering marriages without one? Premarital Agreements should be a conversation for everyone. This doesn’t mean you have to sign one before walking down the aisle, but understanding the law and implications in the event of the divorce could help aid discussions during marriage….So why not?

Lydia Hsu, Esq. is an amazing family law attorney, who stresses the importance of educating her clients not only before marriage, but during the divorce process. She approaches cases with compassion and makes sure he clients know there is a better way to navigate the legal complexities of marriage and divorce.

You Can be Better Apart with Gabrielle Hartley

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 06 Nov 2023 14:00:00 +0000

Hey Hey Friends.

It is appropriate and acceptable to take the time to grieve the end of something you thought would be forever. As you navigate the divorce process, it is important to keep a perspective on what you can control and how to best find the path out of your divorce. Too often people choose messy litigation because they feel like that is the only way to protect themselves and make the other side “pay.” Well our guest, Gabrielle Hartley, can tell you that no one wins in divorce. But you can find a way to be Better Apart.

Gabrielle is an attorney, mediator, author, and one of the biggest driving forces in the positive Divorce Movement. She is my personal mentor and someone I just adore. Enjoy!

Teaser Episode: Date Night convos with Nick Pagan

Chelsea A. Pagan, Esq. — Mon, 30 Oct 2023 17:00:00 +0000

Hey Hey Friends.

Sat down with my Husband, Nick Pagan, back in August 2021 (right before we found out we were pregnant with our daughter Bellamy!). Nick is always up for anything and he did not hesitate to support this new adventure of mine. We chat about our marriage dynamic, communication, and interests. Enjoy!